2012 ACADEMY AWARDS POST SHOW THOUGHTS

With only ten minutes overtime, this year’s Oscar telecast has wrapped and I am absolutely surprised to say that I have not enjoyed an Oscar telecast this much in many, many years.

It seemed as if the Academy Awards "powers-that-be" finally figured out how to not make the show so lugubrious and pompously bloated with its own self-importance. It was a faster paced program, filled with a level of pageantry that felt to be just right. I especially appreciated how the performances of Best Original Song were eliminated and also how similar categories like the Editing categories and the Short Films categories for instance were collected together. That way, the show was able to move briskly. And yes, the return of Billy Crystal was a welcome one as he again showed how effortless he is with being the Master Of Ceremonies for an event as massive as this one.

For this Post Show installment of Savage Cinema, I have tried something different. I have often found it difficult to remember everything that I wanted to remark about when I have written these things in the past. So, for this year, I decided to take notes throughout the show, marking down moments that stood out for me. Sort of like a running narrative. I do have to say that these are the times where I wished that I had a laptop. That way, I could have typed all of this out during the show and it would be ready to post immediately after the end credit scroll. But, it was my trusty pen and yellow legal pad for me, dear readers. That is how I roll!

So without further adieu, here is my assessment of this year’s Oscar telecast…in “real time,” no less!

7:35 p.m. The Opening! Billy Crystal returns to his tried and true bit of inserting himself into sequences from this year’s nominated films. Despite its technical wizardry, it has been a bit that I’ve had mixed feelings about as I have never found it to be as funny as crystal may think that it is. But, it’s zippy, lasts no more than it needs to and it’s a good “ice-breaker.”

7:40 p.m. Billy Crystal always looks right at home on stage. Now, he’s performing that corny song where he sings about the Best Picture nominees, another bit that never feels as funny as he may think that it is. But, again, it’s a good “ice-breaker” and it fits in with his old-fashioned style of humor.

7:44 p.m. The first award of the night already? Now we’re talking! Let’s get on with the show!! YES!! Robert Richardson, cinematographer extraordinaire won for his glorious work with “Hugo.”

7:47 p.m. Dante Ferretti for “Hugo”!! It’s looking like Scorsese’s “band” is in for a good night.

7:49 p.m. Huh? What’s with putting Shelia E. and the house band up in the cheap balcony seats?????

7:58 p.m. Very nice. The (hopefully) first award of the night for “The Artist” as it has just won for Costume Design.

7:59 p.m. Best makeup went to “The Iron Lady”? Hmm…as my wife has just remarked, “They got an award for making Meryl Streep look like Thatcher? That’s not much of a stretch!” I agree and for me, it is the first foul award of the night.

8:00 p.m. I have to say that I am loving the interludes where movie stars are addressing the camera about their favorite movie memories. This is exactly the kind of “filler” that is highly successful because their experiences perfectly mirror the movie going experiences of all of us in the audience. I hope they do this again for future shows.

8:13 p.m. I liked Crystal’s “Super Tuesday” joke. Ah…BEST SUPPORTING ACTRESS…Octavia Spencer…oh well, my first major prediction of the night has gone south. A standing ovation?! Really????

8:20 p.m. The Focus Group short, starring Christopher Guest and his band of repertory players was good and it makes me anxious to see a new film from this troupe again.

8:30 p.m. Oscar always loves a surprise and right now, I am beginning to wonder if the big surprise or surprises this year will be that Octavia Spencer and Viola Davis will both win for “The Help” and that “Hugo” takes Best Picture at this rate.

8:37 p.m. The Cirque Du Soleil performance is reason enough to eliminate the Best Original Song performances. That was great and damn right, you had better give them a standing ovation!!!

8:50 p.m. The show is zooming along and I’m not bored yet. Let’s keep this train on the track!

8:55 p.m. I am not ashamed to say…EMMA STONE!!!!!!!!!!!

9:00 p.m. BEST SUPPORTING ACTOR Christopher Plummer. My prediction worked out this time and he truly deserved it for this film. Plummer’s speech was classy and shows folks just how an acceptance should be delivered.

9:11 p.m. Crystal’s classic “What Am I Thinking?” bit—still cute, still funny and I thought Nick Nolte’s “thoughts” were the best by far.

9:13 p.m. The President of the Academy. And now, the show takes a nose dive.

9:15 p.m. Savage Cinema’s Movie Crush of the night: PENELOPE CRUZ. She’s looks amazing!!! OK…back to Earth. BEST ORIGINAL SCORE…”The Artist”!!!!!! YES!!!! I was really hoping this one would take this particular category as the score had to accomplish what no other film score of the year had to accomplish. A much deserved win.

9:20 p.m. BEST ORIGINAL SONG…It had better be “Man or Muppet” or I’m gonna stone the screen…YES!!! “Man or Muppet” rightfully takes the prize and could it have really been any other choice? (Ferrell and Galifianakis are stellar, BTW…)

9:28 p.m. Angelina Jolie. Oh boy…she really does not need to show her leg. What she really needs to do is eat a sandwich…or even five of them! OK…BEST ADAPTED SCREENPLAY…OK, that was a surprise too…I really thought that “Moneyball” would take this one easily but this win for “The Descendants” was extremely well deserved. In fact, it was the one that I thought should win in the first place.

BEST ORIGINAL SCREENPLAY…Woody!!!!!!

Oh man, Angelina’s elbows…ugh…with her “heroin chic” physique along with Billy Crystal’s obvious plastic “enhancements,” I’m glad I don’t have HDTV.

9:40 p.m. The technical awards always tickle me because it is the moment where Oscar sends a pretty woman to visit the tech geeks who never see sunlight…or women, for that matter (ha ha).

9:53 p.m. MICHAEL DOUGLAS!! Damn, he looks better than Billy Crystal. BEST DIRECTOR…absolutely wonderful…Michael Hazanivicius, so deserving…I really hope his film gets Best Picture.

10:05 p.m. In memoriam. The only real stumble of the night and a shame as this is not the area where you want to foul up. The images were presented much too quickly and the font was poorly designed and difficult to read. This could have been handled much, much better than it was.

10:15 p.m. Natalie Portman…sigh…BEST ACTOR…now I am still not sold on having actors address other actors in regards to the greatness of their performances. I think it feels awkward and slows the proceedings down too much. Just show the clips. YES!!!! JEAN DUJARDIN!!!!!!!!!!!! That’s RIGHT, baby!!!

10:25 p.m. BEST ACTRESS…MERYL STREEP?!?!?!?! Come on!!!!!! Yes, I am one of those people she is scoffing at for scoffing at her win. Her fake humility is insufferable especially as it is in regards to a performance that has not been that highly regarded overall. I think this was the surprise of the night that Oscar had in store for us and what would be an even greater surprise is that her win will stop her from being nominated every single year. But, I wouldn’t count on it.

10:35 p.m. BEST PICTURE…”THE ARTIST”!!!!!!!!

And that’s a wrap, dear readers. As for my predictions? Well...I correctly predicted 5 out of 8 categories. So, that's just a hair more than half. If this were a test in school, that's not so good. But this was all in fun so, no worries as I am not being graded on this.

Until next year...