I am learning how to re-create my own sense of happiness.
I am learning to try and accept when changes happen knowing that everything cannot remain exactly the same forever.
I am learning these things and so much more, especially today as Savage Cinema reaches its 14th birthday.
Dear readers, it was 14 years ago, as I sat in my parents' Chicago home basement, when this blogsite was born and I hit "PUBLISH" for the very first time. And once this posting is published, I would have performed this feat 856 times...and to that accomplishment, I should see it as the accomplishment that it is...and I should be able to hold some pride in this accomplishment.
As I have written about over these last four years, and as you can witness from the decreased pace of new postings, Savage Cinema has slowed down due to personal, mental health issues which arose during the pandemic as well as how the movie industry itself has changed since the pandemic, from the types of movies being shown in theaters, to my home base of Madison, WI losing essentially every movie theater we had ever since my arrival in this city 36 years ago.
Yet, I still love and believe in the art and artistry of the movies. And in doing so, I still love writing about them and I need to rediscover that belief in my abilities with writing about the movies, even if my output has slowed or if my confidence has waned due to my out put slowing. A vicious cycle...
Yet, through everything, year and year, you have been there for me when new postings arrive and I thank you. I thank you for your support, for your faith, for you just sending me any words at all showing me that you have read what I have written and messages have been received.
It has existed for so long that it feels foolish to end it now...even if postings do not arrive as quickly or as frequently as in ears past. And here is where I need to be gentle with myself.
Every review written and posted is an accomplishment, it is a victory. Every single one. I need to claim ownership of this truth...plus the most important one...
I am a writer and this is my art. And I am still a writer and this is still my art even when I am not producing anything or if I go quiet. As I am gentle with myself, I remain grateful to all of you who have ever been with me upon this journey. I don't wish to write in a vacuum for I have always wanted this space to be a point to start conversations about the movies and the subject matter contained within them.
My thankfulness is as bottomless as always. Thank you for allowing me to reach 14 years of this endeavor.
I hope that you will remain with me for even more.
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